There’s a talkshow on TV lately that interviews local celebrities. The only difference is that this programme unearths the little known secrets about these people in the limelight too. Think your bankruptcy past, your sexual history, your unglamourous divorce etc etc…Wow, that’s interesting.

In one of the episodes, it was suggested that a popular artiste was not the biological child of his parents. That caused a big hoo-ha the very next day as the press picked it up very quickly and viewers called the hotlines to protest that they wanted to know the truth as that episode ended on a cliffhanger. Watching the artiste on screen struggle with his own emotions, my heart ached for him. Tears swelled in his eyes and soon rolled down his cheeks as the intruding cameras continued to close up on him.

I’ve read about such stuff. I’ve seen them being acted out in drama serials. But little did I uncover one huge secret that my family had kept for decades. I was let into this secret unknowingly by chance. Such things do happen too to the people I know intimately well.

Two of my cousins are not the biological children of the man and woman they call their parents.

When I first learnt that, it was a shock to me. How can this possibly be?

After all, the birth certificate does indicate that they are the flesh and blood. But Fate has a hand to play in almost everything, this family episode included.

These days, some couples view children as liabilities as it’s expensive to bring up a child, especially in Singapore. But in those days when children were seen more than just a Godsend, it was imperative for daughters-in-law to be able to give birth to healthy children, boys first and then girls in this order, so as to continue the lineage of the clan. Should the daughter-in-law fail in this simple yet sacred duty, she would be sidelined and possibly have to suffer the price of having to share her husband with another woman.

Not based on my conjecture but rather more on facts, the woman was barren or didn’t want to give birth as post-natal slimming then was almost a virtual unknown. Yet she could not jeopardise her position in the family as she was not the only daughter-in-law in the family that had 13 children. She certainly could not just sit by doing nothing and watch the other daughters-in-law lord over her.

Great-Grandfather, as the esteemed partriach of the clan, could not be angered. He was a man known for offering carrots and sticks. Should a male child be born, the parents would be given $10, 000 and for a daughter, $5000. In those days, $10, 000 and $5000 were considerably huge sums. The daughter-in-law of course, would not want to miss out on this pot of gold.

She adopted two babies, a boy and a girl subsequently, through her vast contacts and just in time, managed to register herself as the biological mother. She could have bribed the hospital, or she could have pretended to be pregnant, or she could have gotten a surrogate mother…how she did it still remains a mystery.

Fast forward to year 2009. The children are all grown up now. They call the parents father and mother. Yet this secret, which I now know, will never be let known to them. Never in this lifetime.

Imagine what will happen if they knew they were not the biological children of this man and woman. Would they just pack up and leave in search of their blood parents? Or will they continue to live cordially with the couple whom they have been addressing as parents all these years?

Personally, I feel the children have a right to know the truth. Everyone has the right to know the truth. Yes, the children would have to come to terms with the truth. Many a times, the truth hurts. Behind his web of deceit lies the good intentions of the couple who have slogged hard to provide them with a good life. Do they not have a moral responsibility to look after the couple who are now in their twilight years? Yet then again, do they not to acknowledge the ones who gave them flesh and blood? If I were the biological parent and I was forced to sell my child because I needed the money or I had no financial means to bring him up, how much more angst and pain would it bring to me. It would haunt me everyday till the day I die.

Whatever stand I take, I am in no position to say anything. The onus lies with the couple to decide if they want to reveal the secret or bring the secret with them to the grave.

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