从远处看到XX号巴士车快来了，心中开始兴奋起来。瞄了手表一下，以为今天能早点回家休息。谁知人算不如天算。XX号巴士车里的人挤得像沙丁鱼一样，司机连停都不停！虽然挤，但是巴士车里还有站的空位啊！干吗不停？

太迟了！巴士车不停就是不停。我又能拿司机怎洋？喊冤啊！真的是有一点叫天天不应,叫地地不灵的感觉。

没法子。只好等下一辆巴士车。

等巴士车真的很考耐心。巴士车不像地铁，让人有预知下一辆到来的时间。

其实等巴士车就好像等女人一样，必须有极大的毅力和耐心，才能赢得美人归。女人化妆，我等。女人逛街买衣服，我等。女人试衣，我等。女人上厕所，我等。当女人赴约迟到时，我还是等。目前等一个女生的最长记录是两个小时。真要命！我就像等巴士车一样，痴痴地等，心里却觉得像一个白痴。不等又不知道她几时会出现，只好等。她出现后又摆出一幅若无其事的样子。分明是给对方玩弄了一把！可恶！谁叫我当时情窦初开？所谓不经一事，不长一智。

巴士车啊巴士车，我这一等就足足等了二十四分钟。什么能早点回家休息的愿望早就化为乌有！

我等到了。远看又有一辆XX号巴士车将驾过来。心里一时兴奋，又一时心惊。万一历史有重演呢？不会吧！

不管了。。。我拼了老命也要挤上巴士车！

停！停！停！巴士车虽然满，但这次它停了下来。即使我得站在巴士车的楼梯上，我也心甘情愿。

Comments(0)

The questions came fast and furious. The replies were, however, lacking in speed and at best, hesitant and measured.

I could tell A relished firing the salvos like a revolver put on the automatic mode whereas B was having a hard time shielding himself from the shots. Poor thing. The names of A & B shall not be revealed to protect the guilty and innocent. Haha…

Such a scenario can only happen during a gathering. Yes, it’s our manpower gathering today. Though the turnout was smaller than the last time (only 5 of us made time this round), it certainly wasn’t lacking in the fun element.

And fun it was! For once, I was thankful I wasn’t the centre of attention when it came to answering questions. Instead, I was like a supporting actor, squeezed in between the two protagonists A & B. Phew!

Food is not the main focus of such gatherings. It’s the catching up that I enjoy most. After all, it’s been almost a year or slightly more since I last saw some of my ex-colleagues. Yeah, how fast time flies by…

But for the record, I think I made the right choice by ordering fish. A & B, who concidentally ordered chicken, felt they got ripped off coz the chicken portion was small. Very small indeed. Perhaps it was a kampong chicken? Maybe.

After the chicken which ruffled a few feathers and caused a little unhappiness, the updating process started. I didn’t have to say much as my life is so transparent, courtesy of longtaizi.org, for the whole world to read and see. In fact, I didn’t give much of an update either. Haha…

Then it started to get saucier and saucier as the night lingered on. For the attached (A & B), the inevitable questions of birds, bees, latex and honey could not be avoided. In fact, I think it was a ploy between the two of them since they have had some experience.

Relationships, love and sex issues and questions arose. That’s how men think. Haha…

“So how many times a week do you guys do it?”

“Too often that you lost count?”

“Do you use…?”

“……….?”

“….?”

The fivesome at the latest manpower gathering

I sat there waiting for the embarrassed, albeit short answer and the next question in rapid quick succession. There was no letting go once one protagonist swung into top form. The momentum just had to continue. Hey, I was really enjoying myself seeing someone getting tormented and embarrassed at the same time. This is way better than a $10 movie on a Friday night boy…hahahaha…

But in all honest, I think it was in good fun. Or should I say they were comparing notes? Hmm…Guess you can’t be so open in the office, right?

I’m looking forward to the next gathering at the end of the year

Comments(0)

I finally got a glimpse of how the F1 Singapore Grand Prix trophy will look like today. I don’t mean to be a wet blanket to the inaugural F1 night race but I don’t like it. Serious. I don’t mince my words.

The inaugural F1 Singapore Grand Prix trophy

My first impression of it is that it looks too like my ex-office building. Cold, uninviting, steel-like, without the human touch. But then again, you can’t blame the design. The F1 race is indeed about man and his machine. There is no room for errors on the track as a single error may cause one the championship. Worse, a second of misconcentration can send the car spinning out of control and crashing. 

It may look arty farty but oh yes, the design just reminds me of the plastic flower holders you find in a flower shop. Is the winner going to put some roses, chrysanthemums, baby’s breath or liles in the containers? Goodness!

Yucks!

Comments(0)

My client surprised me today by telling me she had something for me. I was scratching my head trying to figure out what she meant. Did she have some sore muscles for me or more new clients?

Neither.

From her gym bag, she pulled out a towel and passed it to me.

“This is for you. Wanted to give it to you last week but forgot. Hee.”

It’s a towel from Beijing! Oh yes. She was in Beijing recently for the Olympics and even witnessed Usain Bolt’s world record 100m run at the Bird’s Nest. So envious am I boy…

Beijing 2008 Olympics commemorative towel

It’s been a long while since someone surprised me with a gift out of the blue. And it must be a very good surprise that must actually catch me by surprise. In this case, I was really surprised, pleasantly surprised I must say.

It’s a small gift. But it’s a towel of goodness. At least someone remembered me all the way in Beijing and actually bought me something. That means a lot. Thank you!

Comments(0)

I expected an aircon bus to drive into the bus bay when I flagged it. After all, aircon buses are the norm nowadays.

But I was surprised to see a non air-con bus stopping at the bus stop. In this age and time, Singapore still has non air-con buses? Surprise surprise…

I remember taking the non air-con bus 151 during my uni days ago. And each time 151, I was praying hard for the air-con counterpart to come instead. Sometimes my prayers were answered, sometimes they were not. And if I was not in a hurry to get to school, I would purposely wait for the air-con service.

Thinking back, taking a non air-con bus is a pretty fun thing to do. And btw, bus service 151 still has non air-con as well.

Just didn’t think I would actually board a non air-con bus today.

View from the non air-con SBS bus service 32

It was a sense of deja vu taking the non air-con SBS bus service 32 from opposite Bugis Junction to my training destination. With all windows half open, it was a cooling trip all the way.

Not many people chose to sit near the window. I wondered why initially. Then I realised it could be because they were afraid of the dust from the air.

Well yes, in a non air-con bus, you don’t have the air-conditioner to protect you from the outside dusty elements. Your face tends to get dirtier (don’t believe? Wipe it with a tissue immediately after you get off the bus…you will see speckles of black dirt on the tissue…that’s dust particles from the air).

But come on, how often do you really get dirty? It’s alright once in a while. I’m not asking you to get your face dirty all the time. The probability of getting a non air-con public bus in Singapore is 1%.

I enjoyed the ride very much. With the wind rushing to greet me when the bus tyres gained adrenalin and blowing my hair into a tidy mess, I swear I would have loved to put my hand out of the window to feel the wind in the motion. Or even pop my head out to soak in the sense of freedom. Only my better judgement prevented me from doing either of this. I didn’t want to be labelled as a public nuisance and ordered off the bus. So sit I did obediently in my window seat while imagining the fun I could have had.

It’s the little things in life that make me happy. I don’t need diamond rings or a closet full of clothes

Comments(0)

I read with horror the ongoing saga involving the Chinese milk powder contaminated with melamine which has thus far made 1,253 babies sick.

As more reports file in, the numbers keep increasing. Two babies have already died from drinking the formula laced with melamine in a ploy by farmers to boost the apparent protein content of the milk that they sold to one of the best-known milk powder manufacturers in the country.

I felt my inner organs churn a little when I found out that my favourite (or should I use ex-favourite) has also been banned as it is also suspected of being contaminated. Holy shit! Could I be in some form of health trouble as well?

“Mengniu (蒙牛) was among those named for having milk powder samples which tested positive for melamine…”

I became a huge fan of Mengniu milk, especially the walnut flavour after I first drank it in China last year. I recall drinking Mengniu every night for eight consecutive days while on holiday there. After my return, I started drinking Mengniu too.

And as I started reading more, I found that Yili and subsequently Mengniu are just the tip of the iceberg. Below is the list (till date) of all milk products from China found containing melamine.

Steer clear…read the labels first…you have been warned!

• Natural Choice Yogurt Flavoured Ice Bar with Real Fruit
• Nestle Dairy Farm UHT Pure Milk
• Mengniu Pure Milk
• Yili Pure Milk
• Yili High calcium low fat milk beverage
• Yili Super Bean Red Bean Chestnut Ice Bar
• Yili Bean Club- Matcha red bean ice bar
• Yili High Calcium Milk Beverage
• Yili Bean Club- Red bean milk bar
• Yili Prestige Chocliz – Dark Chocolate Bar
• Yili Pure Milk
• KLIM Instant Full Cream Milk Powder ( 1.8 kg )
• Nestle Carnation Calcium Plus Non Fat Milk Powder ( 1.6 kg )
• Nespray
• Monmilk Breakfast Milk Walnut Milk Beverage
• Monmilk Suan Suan Ru Sour Milk Beverage (Mango Flavour)
• Vita Fresh Milk
• Nestle Vanilla Flavour Ice Cream Cone
• Nestle Chocolate Flavour Ice Cream Cone
• Meiji Ujikintoki (red bean and green tea frozen confection)
• Meiji Hokkaido Azuki (red bean ice cream)
• Trappist Dairy Low Fat Yogurt Drink

Comments(0)

I was honked again today. And I bet my last dollar this won’t be the last time.

Minding my own business and walking on the pedestrian pavement these days just isn’t the norm anymore. It’s no longer the safe side of the road which I’ve been taught in school.

In fact, it’s dangerous. So bloody dangerous.

All thanks to the cyclists who have claimed the pavements as their own. They think it’s their grandfather’s road and everyone should steer clear of them. If you don’t steer clear, you’ll either get hit from behind or get honked at.

These people who insist on riding their bicycles on the pavements must either have their brains growing on their asses or be suffering from some cheap thrill syndrome which they exploit to the fullest.

Whenever I get honked from behind, I immediately have to step aside like a subservient servant to allow the intruding master to pass me by. And mind you, it’s often a close shave by a few millimetres before he or she hits me. Pavements in Singapore are not that wide, yet we have this group of idiots cycling on them.

I don’t blame them as they have low IQs. They have been riding like this back in their hometowns. Yes, most of the culprits are our so called foreign workers. I don’t have to be so explicit as to name the countries where they come from. But it’s god damn obvious.

I think I better start collecting some huge rocks. Next time they startle me, I’d just throw rocks at them, cause them to lose balance and fall off their bicycle.

I’m fed up…really pissed.

Comments(0)

There’s a Chinese saying 无事不登三宝殿 that would be translated into something like this in English “if there’s nothing, you wouldn’t ascend the palace of three treasures”.

I got a call from an acquaintance I have not heard for at least the past 1.5 years. My first thought was to ask what she wanted.

I was just waiting for her to state her actual reason for calling.

Ya da ya da ya da…off she goes in her seemingly concerned tone about how I was getting on, what I was doing etc…

I was just entertaining her by replying. Actually, I sounded pretty fed up. Condescending to a certain extent as well.

Then after all the well rehearsed ceremonious openings, she started.

The vixen has revealed her tail. Finally. Just get to the point. You are wasting my precious talk time.

She wanted to sell me a water treatment system. Why would I want to buy a water treatment system from someone I don’t even know that well? And besides, I don’t need one now.

As its name suggests, a water treatment system is this thing which you hook next to your tap, usually in the kitchen. It will supposedly kill the bacteria in the tap water, filter and purify it by use of its UV cathodes.

Modern men are too dependent on such creature comforts. If I start to drink 99% purified water, then I have to make sure I continue this healthy fad right?

This means I can’t go to the supermarket and buy my fresh milk or to the local drinks stall and slurp sugar cane anymore. Much less Mr Bean for its soya bean drink. The reason is because they don’t have a water treatment system. Do you think these places actually purify the water before they make your milk or sugar cane or soya bean?

So no. No need for any water treatment system. You can keep it for yourself. Thank you very much.

Comments(1)

It’s my first public talk this year and I’m all excited about it. In fact, I’ve been spending the last few days preparing for it, scripting and rescripting my data.

So here I am at the NUSS (National University of Singapore Society) Suntec City Guild House at the invitation of Singapore Institute of Management (SIM) to give a dinner talk.

At the NUSS Suntec City Guild House for my dinner talk

I received the invitation to speak a few months ago and accepted it as I felt it would be a blessing to share my knowledge with others. More importantly, it would allow me to fulfil my aim of becoming a world-class trainer.

My table tag

My name tag

After a brief introduction by the VP, Quality, Mr Chua Kok Leong, who read aloud my credentials and experience, I was ready to start.

VP Quality, Mr Chua Kok Leong introducing me to the audience

Quality performance starts with quality lifestyle. Let the dinner talk begin! 

For my 90min talk, I decided to have the participants do some work instead of hearing me talk all the time. By doing exercises and then discussing it with a partner (partner share) and subsequently sharing with the class (class share), it reinforces the learning and brings it to another new level.

Time management exercise worksheet

Participants hard at work doing their exercises

Partners sharing what they wrote

Female participant sharing with the audience what she wrote in the exercise (class share)

I threw out all the difficult concepts and devised easy to remember, yet effective phrases which the participants would be able to identify with. After all, they were not here to hear from Emeritus Professor Lionel Lim, but Lifestyle Coach Lionel Lim. There’s a rule of thumb which I always observe – if I can simplify concepts or things for people such that they can easily learn and duplicate it, I have already succeeded in my mission.

Your friendly Lifestyle Coach

Yes, I see myself as a lifestyle coach as I go beyond helping clients reach a new appreciation of their bodies and physical abilities. I do more than just that. I help them come to a new appreciation of who they are and what they can become. By utilising mediation and neuro linguistic techniques, I make training fun and memorable. Who says working out in the gym or running on the threadmill can’t be exciting? I just buck the trend.

Massage time for participants

The participants were in a big surprise when I actually got them to stand up, turn around and massage the person standing in front. From the initial hesitation to the “give me give me give me more”, I could tell they were having fun.

Bearing in mind the participants just had dinner, it wasn’t wise to get them to do any physical exercises. I wish I could have so that they could bring home extra useful tips. But I’m sure they learnt a great deal tonight.

I swear I could have continued speaking as I had so much more to share. But as a professional trainer, I must keep within the time allocated. I’ll leave that to the next seminar

Comments(0)

今天看了晚报的头条新闻后，心情非常低落。就像这世界和人生开了一个玩笑一样。

王菲流产了。

据晚报报导，王菲流产的原因有三个。

第一，现任老公李亚鹏爱泡夜店，是花心萝卜一个。泡夜店时，当然是把妻女丢在家里。这是夫妻大吵和冷战的因素。

第二，王菲怀孕不满一个月就飞去不丹出席刘嘉玲梁朝伟的婚礼，是导致胎儿不稳原因之一。毕竟王菲是高龄产妇。

第三，王菲经理人陈家锳在她怀孕四十天就对外宣布，说衰了嘴。因为我们华人迷信，在胎儿未满三个月之前若对外公开，胎儿将不保。

也许你会问我王菲流产管我什么事？ 我又不是她丈夫、更不是她家婆。

身为王菲的歌迷，我为她不值。她逐渐淡出娱乐圈已是事实。王菲为爱放弃了一切，可是屡爱屡伤。

1996年，王菲怀孕后，嫁给了摇滚乐手窦唯。可是好景不长在，1999年夫妻俩以离婚收场。因为窦唯爱的并不是王菲。窦唯的“高原是我真爱”宣言听了让人觉得王菲嫁错了。

王菲后来和小她十一岁的坏男孩谢霆锋走在一起。可是这段姐弟恋在2004年销声匿影。是王菲梦醒了还是谢霆锋觉得王菲没有利用价值了？至今还是一个谜。

2004年，王菲又认识了李亚鹏。恋爱一年后，2005年王菲正式成为李太太。在王菲事业如日中天的当儿，她突然宣布不再唱了，决定并搬回北京，在家做贤妻良母。

王菲真是命苦。我想起了王菲唱过的一首歌《扑火》，她的恋曲，仿佛巧妙地写在歌词里。女人啊。。。要嫁，就要嫁得幸福、嫁得快乐！

《扑火》

不在乎多少人在等我的拥抱
只迫切想拥有你的微笑
自尊丢到墙角
掏出所有的好
你还是不看
你还是不要
每一天都有梦在心里头死掉
我自己对自己
大声咆哮
人太忠于感觉
就难好好思考
我痛的想哭
却傻傻的笑
爱到飞蛾扑火
是种堕落
谁喜欢天天把折磨当享受
可是为情奉献
让我觉得
自己是骄傲的
伟大的
爱到飞蛾扑火
是很伤痛
我只是相信人总会被感动
你为什么就是
不能爱我
像我那么深的爱你为什么
为什么

Comments(0)